Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Music starts playing like the end of a sad movie...

[It's the kind of ending you don't really want to see]

WG and I broke up.
What an opening line, eh?
It was just time. The happiness was beginning to fade & we didn't know where to take it.
I felt like I couldn't picture my own future, because I didn't know where he stood.
That's a horrible feeling.
Was he next to me? Was he even in Louisiana? Was I still living in my hometown? Was I happy? Was he happy?
I didn't know. He didn't know. We didn't know.
So, it's over.
We hugged tight, he carried my bags to my car, and I managed to get away with only one tear having rolled down my cheek.
I drove home listening to music that makes my heart feel something.
I stopped off and bought a cute top, because it was Valentine's day & I had just endured a break up...I deserved it.
I talked to my Mom on the phone and told her what had happened.
She said I sounded good, but my heart felt a little empty.
Let me make it clear that I AM OKAY.
I am more okay than I ever could have imagined I would be,
because I laid in bed and thought about this for a week before it happened.
& I know that God is watching me and he knows what comes next,
but tonight...
Tonight, I'm back in this bed of mine and my heart...
it feels a little empty.
Because boy, for a while there that love was so sweet.
Isn't that the way it works though?
Sometimes it fades.
But tomorrow is a new day,
and I am going to fill it with jogging, fabric scraps, paint, family & thoughts of my future.
& Dreams of what I'll have one day.
What I've always wanted,
& what I deserve:
A simple life that is full of love.
Tomorrow is a new day.


32 love notes:

  1. I'm so sorry lady, but I hear you... The ex and I weren't meant to be either, and most days I am strong and confident in that (and in God's pointing me in another direction), but some days? Some days I still need to mourn the love that was there before it wasn't... Big Hugs. Break ups are a pain.

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  2. God places people in our lives for a reason and just because they aren't in our future doesn't mean they don't have a place in our hearts.
    You deserve everything you've ever dreamed of and one day (hopefully sooner than later) all your hopes and dreams will come true.
    Just keep your head up and dream big!

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  3. I am so sorry. :( But it sounds like you are handling everything ok and are doing ok. :(

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  4. Well I hope today is a good day for you.

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  5. wow. I really needed to read this today. I broke up last week too. I was debating calling him, but now I know not to. Thanks. (and sorry you are down too!)

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  6. Oh, good for you to write about it...dating is a tough world, the way I look back at it is this...you are learning what you do and don't want out of someone...it's all about learning. He was meant for a time...

    Stay busy girl, the best medicine!

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  7. I'm so sorry to hear about your breakup! I give you so much credit for accepting that it was time to walk away - for a lot of people, they can't do it. I know you will find the love you are looking forward and deserve in the end. *hugs*

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  8. I'm sorry to hear that. Breakups are never easy even if they are for the best. *hugs*

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  9. Oh, I'm sorry to hear that, but if it doesn't feel right then you can't make it right. I'm glad you feel like it's for the best. Your Prince Charming is out there!! :)

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  10. Oh my sweet girl!!! My girlfriend is leaving today so I will call you when I drop her off. I want to see how you're doing and check in....

    Love ya sweets.

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  11. Hi Lacey - I read everyday, but rarely comment, so I thought I would step out of the lurker-corner today! So bummed to hear that chapter of your fairy tale is over, but so happy that you're at peace with your choice! Love is the thing, lady, and from what I can tell, you're one of it's biggest cheerleaders. Here's to never settling for less than BIG love!

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  12. Oh girl... I'm so sorry! Break-ups suck no matter how much you know it's the right thing. I'm here if you ever want/need to talk! *hugs*

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  13. awww... i'm so sorry.... hope you'll be ok. everything happens for a reason :)

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  14. wow hun i wasnt even this strong on my last break up.

    -cris

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  15. *Big Hugs* Make the decisions that are right for you, it's hard, but in the long run everything will be okay, and if it isn't... Well there's still more to come.

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  16. ahh. i'm so sorry. i know very well the pain of heartbreak, but you are right - TOMORROW.IS.A.NEW.DAY and you deserve only the very, very best. nothing less.

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  17. First off! I love that Im your this weeks crush! awww

    secondly, wow. thats a lot to handle, i love how you're so strong with dealing with it. sometimes things are not right and you need to break it off, glad you realized that before it was to late. Your prince is going to come and sweep you off your feet. dont worry love. xoxo im here if you need to talk!

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  18. What!!!! I loved that picture of him in the kitchen cooking for you! Oh, my. You need to listen to Amy Winehouse's "Love Is A Losing Game" I'm sorry, but there are a lot of fish in the old sea.
    Mary

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  19. aww im so happy for you looking past the empty feeling and seeing the good. I'm sure everything will end up working out soon.

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  20. Sorry to hear about the break-up.. glad you are okay with it. It still sucks though. Maybe a new outfit will help and some girls night out therapy?

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  21. My sweet friend.
    I commend you for...
    Your strength.
    Your honesty.
    Staying true to yourself.
    Being real.

    Might i suggest a listen to the song "Exactly" by Amy Steinberg. I think it may fill you with some peace/strength.

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  22. Love your attitude, lady. I'm not going to say I'm sorry to hear about your break-up because it sounds like it was the right thing, and how can you be sorry about the right thing? I'm proud you had the guts to do what was best for you and your life. The empty heart sucks, but soon enough it will be filled with love!

    Keep smiling, keep strong, keep true to you. There'll be good days and bad days, but you have your faith, and you'll be perfectly ok!

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  23. So sorry to hear about you and WG, but glad you are doing well. Also, sorry about your grandfather being ill. I felt like I was living in a long nightmare for a while, but had peace when we finally laid him to rest. Stay busy, love will find its way to you! *hugs*

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  24. *Hug* Breakups stink, but when it isnt right, it isnt right, and it seems like thats what you were feeling. And when one door closes another one opens, and who knows what's ahead,...but I'm sure it's amazing! You do deserve the best!

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  25. I was sorry to read about your bad day.

    Dating is hard, but the best advice I can give is that you need to take care of yourself. And yes, you need to be worried about your future. I tell all my single friends that - you don't want to wake up three years later and be like, "Where did all that time go."

    Hang in there. I enjoyed reading all of the comments and it seems that you have some great support, girl.

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  26. Oh, Lacey honey -- I'm sorry things didn't work out. But I have to tell you that you sound so much better than you did with earlier breakups. You sound stronger. You sound more sure of yourself.

    I also must tell you that as I take the opposite approach (don't put myself out there, hibernate, think too much,bury myself in projects) your propensity to take a leap for the idea of love is inspiring.

    You hang in there and keep posting. I'll keep reading and trying to find my inner southern gal who's not afraid to take chances.

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  27. new follower here.

    so sorry! Glad to hear you are doing okay!

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  28. If you're okay, then so am I!

    You're so mature in the way you're handling this. Good for you, strong woman. xo

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  29. Wow. What a lot youve been going through. A couple of years ago, I went through a break up from a relationship that had lasted over five years. It was mostly mutual and for all the right reasons. Your thoughts about your break up remind me a lot of what I went through and I just wanted to let you know that it does turn out ok. Better than you think even. When you can make those tough and uncomfortable decision to better yourself, it is all worth it. You know what you deserve and only you can be sure.

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  30. summer bear is proud of you and she loves you!

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  31. I am sorry that you guys broke up but you sound very upbeat and positive!

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You've always been my favorite... don't tell the others!