Friday, October 30, 2009

It's confession time...and I'm not even Catholic

Hey ya'll.
{Trying to bring a little of Lacey back in the house....heyyy ooohhhh}

So yesterday you met Lacey's longest friend, Lauren, and today....well people, today you get me. I'm Summer from Le Musings of Moi....and while Lauren may have had her first....um, well....guess what?

I had her last.

But, whatevs. I'm good at sharing. No tug o war needed here.

Anyway, when Lacey asked me babysit her baby for her, I was so relieved.
Because you see...there has been something I've been wanting to confess, and I certainly didn't want to do it at my place.
Especially because over there it's Fashion Friday, not Feeling Friday.
{Okay, so that last part sounded better in my head...}

Anyway, here goes....it's confession time.

Sometimes, I'm embarrassed to admit to being a blogger.

Yes, I admit it.

My name is Summer, and I'm sometimes embarrassed to say I'm a blogger.

{Please, hold the stones....lest anyone start their judging}

Often times I find myself saying I have a "website."

I'm a "writer." {but, I am! I am!}

And in Vegas I "went to a conference. For writing."

Or for a "girls weekend."

{Okay, whatever, so it changed depending on who I told....}

I dunno. Maybe I feel like it's because people don't take bloggers seriously.

Or maybe I think people will judge me by thinking that I must be so self obsessed that I need a blog to promote myself.

{ahem.}

Or maybe I feel like people will think I'm a chat room dweeb making "friends" online.

{Not saying if you like chat rooms you're a dweeb. You know, it's the others who say it.}

But, you know what?

Those people can just suck it. Because I'm ready to come out with it.

I'm loud, and I'm proud, and I'm a blogger gosh darn it. And people like me.
{Stuart Smalley, can I get a "what what?!?"}

And it's because of those people that like me (go along with it) that I'm willing to take the risk of being embarrassed.

Over the last two years (geesh, it's been awhile), I have come to know some amazing amazing people simply by us opening up our hearts, and our worlds, and taking the chance at being vulnerable online.

I have been encouraged more than I could have ever asked for in times that have been so dark. I have laughed on days I didn't think I could find my smile. I have cried for people who hurt that I had never even met....in person. I have bonded and loved and found joy...

And I have come to believe that this world, this blogging world, is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. Because there is an incredible openness, an inspiring vulnerability, and a refreshing lack of judgement here that you just don't find too often these days.

What's crazy is that it has taken me two years to figure this out.

But in the last month, there have been several girlees who have changed from "a reader" or "a blog I read," to someone I know. These someones know me. These someones have my heart, and I theirs.

They are someones who have become closer than friends and more like sisters, and what has bonded us together, I know can never be broken.

Someones like Lacey.....(and you other girls too....you know exactly who you are!)
{Lacey gets her name mentioned, you know, being it is her blog and all.}

It's because of you girls, you and you, and you and you...and you....that have me ashamed of ever being ashamed.

Had it not been for my blog, your blogs, and this silly little blogging world....I wouldn't have found what I never knew I was missing.

The rest of my heart. My other pieces.

You complete me.

You had me at hehh...hehh...hellllloooo.....*sob, sob*

See now?

Aren't you glad you didn't throw stones?

No need to judge! I'm just a slow learner, but this lesson was definitely worth the time.

Whew. I can't begin to tell you how much better I feel now.

Confession feels great.

******

Thanks Lacey love, and to all my girls...for everything.

Ya'll have no idea how I am changed....because of you.

Muah.

******



© 2009 "Le Musings of Moi"

12 love notes:

  1. Confession has never sounded so good....here's to coming out and being proud (of blogging!).

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  2. I am so glad I didn't pull a David and start throwing stones at the "giant" blogger! :)

    Couldn't ask for anything better than 2 of my fav girlies in one place! Love you both!! MUAH!

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  3. AWWWW!!!! AGAIN 2 of my favorites. I die.

    This is why I love blogging...I never thought I would meet friends like I have, both of you included! XOXO!!

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  4. Oh Summer....thank you for letting go of the humiliation. We are all in this together. Bloggers are people too...and we have feelings. I will wear my blogger sticker proudly.

    Ahem.

    *psst...Summer...if anyone asks though, we met at the mall in 2002...both grabbed the same tunic at Nordstrom and hit off from there. mmkay??*

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  5. Summer... I totally feel you! Sometimes when I have a convo and I say... "I saw on this blog that I read.." I feel quite dorky. BUT... I am P.R.O.U.D. to know all of my bloggy friends. They are amazing women whom I wouldn't have known otherwise!

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  6. Right, Mama Kat...Nordstroms. People will totally believe I shop there! lol

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  7. I LOVe your post!

    To be completely honest, I've often shared the same insecurities as you about blogging, and I lot of ppl still don't know that I blog ... some people just don't get it ;(

    But congrats on coming out lol

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  8. totally agree.

    i actually had a guy tell me "you have a blog and you're not engaged?" he was totally surprised.

    most people just don't get why blogging is so dang amazing. some of the best women.. and men.. i have ever met, have been through the blogging world. besties for life.

    thanks for confessing. bet it's good to finally get it off your chest.

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  9. GREAT post!! I totally know what you mean... most of the time when I say I have a blog, people are like "oh what-- do you sit there and bitch about things all day"...

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  10. I know what you mean. Some people can be pretty judgmental, they easily think I have no life and friendless in real life to blog in the first place. And when I told them about a blogger I like, they easily smirk and say,"oh isn't that your online friend?" In a tone that made me wanna smash them with hammer.

    I learn not to care so much though, because I love blogging. And my blogger friends are really amazing!

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  11. i was never one to hesitate, but i sure learned fast that maybe i should have been...haha...like when you ask someone if they blog before they find out you do and they reply, "uh.ha!! NO blogging is for ratards" um.cool i do it....hahaha...but then they go the the blog read it and get addicted and call and get angry at me if i don't post something b/c they are at work and look forward to seeing something from me to entertain them..so HA! oh okay calming down now....yeah i am a loud mad bad hobo...er blogger!!!! and I LOVE LOVE LOVE MY BLOGGING GAL PALS LIKE YOU AND LACEY!!!!! yeyey for hopefully meeting in real life someday!

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  12. Amen to THIS!

    (And I'm not even that religious.)

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You've always been my favorite... don't tell the others!